Listening to a Tara Brach podcast on my morning walk, she tells a story about road construction, that annoyance each of us has experienced that brings up feelings of frustration and thoughts of being late to work or picking up our child on time. The first construction worker directing traffic holds a sign that says “Go Slow.” The 2nd one’s sign read “Stop to look at the flowers.” The 3rd sign? “OK, now you can get back on your frenzied, chaotic way toward more stress!” I had to laugh because it’s so true. It’s always “how can I just get through this obstacle and back to the trajectory of life that sends me spinning and spinning all the time?”
Yet, those first two signs hold the key to how life can settle into a less frenetic movement. How can we slow down, pause, look and really see the beauty around us? If we slow down, there’s space to calm our worried parts, the ones who keep us in line so we aren’t reprimanded, hurt, embarrassed, or shamed. How can we keep the image of safety within us so that we avoid the frenzy and tenacious negative energy that rules our choices throughout the day?
I have an idea, actually something I know that you may not. This is about our perceptions and how we receive incoming data and information that clouds the sweet reception of life. Parts of us that hold fear, unworthiness, and other tender vulnerabilities are receiving incoming threats and are working very hard to keep us safe from more of the same. These parts often are the ones involved in binge eating and drinking, Cookie Monster parts that eat Oreo’s to calm us, numb us, keep the deep emotions away. Yet, they pull us right into the shame. I’d so enjoy working together to find a way to start your journey of befriendiing these parts to allow you to be as you are with a quieter attitude and more loving space around you.