Dieting gives us purpose. It keeps us on the straight and narrow path toward unveiling the beautiful, skinny person that lives inside of us.
Binges and overeating reinforce just how undisciplined, apathetic and hopeless we really are. Dieting is our consistent way of getting it right.
We worship the god of love, light and peace through restriction and deprivation. By dieting, we prove how punitive parts of us can be, how long other parts can live in deprivation, how tough we are. Through diets, we show our strength and find validation of our goodness.
Life will be perfect when our skinny jeans fit, when the weight that limits our capacity to find love or the perfect job, and that separates our heart, soul and mind falls off our body. We think skinny people have perfect lives and reach out and take what they want — because of their weight!
Absurd, isn’t it? The story continues…
Restrictive eating is how we obtain perfection by diminishing fat bellies, thighs and hips, banning cellulite, and creating a steadier state of mind. We pack away nagging thoughts and feelings we can’t tolerate and put a pretty bow on top.
Diets fix us and stop the emotional parts of us that are married to being less than, undesirable, unredeemable—like shame, guilt, and abandonment. Diets fill the empty space and our dissatisfaction with our selves and life fades away.
It doesn’t work that way.
Diets numb us to reality. The part of you that restricts hides the truth. The part that binges conceals your true nature. The part that overeats covers your soul.
Compulsive eating is a bright red Exit sign when life isn’t what you signed up for. Restricting is a refusal to play that game any longer. You pulse between fullness and emptiness as a control mechanism to mask the parts of that hold unhappiness.
What will you hold onto, what is your purpose, who are you if you don’t diet and obsess all day about how your flabbiness defines you, rice cakes acknowledge your strength, and salads sans dressing demonstrate your fortitude?
You hold onto the present moment—without judgment. You listen to your breath. You feel your heart beating. You acknowledge you are alive and worthy to be who you are! You discover your purpose is not to punish yourself but to celebrate all the different parts of you, to bring more beauty into the world simply by being you, joyful you. You discover your Self—where Compassion, Clarity, and Connection reside.
Your relationship with food is a powerful coping strategy in dealing with a painful past. There are parts of you that hold tight to that story. There are better strategies now to cope. You can integrate them and heal yourself.
I get it, I do understand. It’s easier to continue punishing yourself, to push down and cover up the parts of you that hold the painful feelings with food instead of patiently listening to them. So they can let go of old beliefs that no longer are needed to protect you. Your obsession with body and food appears to give you purpose, quiets the ugly roar of life, and occupies you so you don’t have time to really face the music. It robs you of pleasure, joy, and the abundance of bliss that is your birthright.
The truth leaves you vulnerable. That’s scary.
Standing in your truth, your vulnerable parts stop stuffing down your essence with cookies and ice cream. You do the Courageous work of being present and open-hearted to get in touch with the parts of you that hold old stories that no longer define or support you.
Diets are an illusion. The rhythm of restriction and binging is not real.
Ultimately, it’s not about the number on the scale or the shape or size of your body. It’s about finding Connection, of satisfying your deep internal desire to belong, and of glimpses of the light of your truest essence— to the full revelation of the cadence of your core. The pulsation within the heart of who you really are.
It’s about believing in your own authentic voice. And quieting the voices that no longer serve.